God of War : Kratos' PSP from Hades Himself

This is one for the ages folks. Of course God of War has always been for the ages. I mean a freakin' mortal kills the war god Ares, takes his place, and then threatens to destroy Mount Olympus itself! In simpleton-terms, some random guy from Sparta, stabs a god, and becomes really, really, powerful. But with God of War: Chains of Olympus coming to the PSP, who dares to wield Kratos' power without the portable gaming system influenced by the game itself. Currently up for bid on eBay, this, is how doom itself is played. So if you have 2 grand lying around, feel free to try to outbid the next big fanatic. But I am sure that before this is over, the price will be upwards of 2500 dollars.

E3 - That Nagging Aftertaste

E3 is now well over but as reviews still are being printed, I can't help but scream out to gamers they have been duped. A lot of the gamers out there said that Sony had the best conference. Then a lot of the news agencies said that Nintendo had the best conference. Amidst the numbers ands charts that the Microsoft folks live, no one seriously loved their conference. Why is this the case? Have you all gotten memos I didn't receive? First of all Sony had too much ground to make up to truly win anything. If anything though, they did regain their previous status from their PS2 glory days. Playstation 2 was the console to get last generation. It had the games, and the fan base to build a great empire. The newest addition to the family is a city brat to say the least. It brags and boasts and costs to much money to get just right. Sony's internal studios have always mad amazing games, but it took to damn long with the PS3. I am sorry Sony, all you did was make a home entertainment center with a few good games that aren't even third party. Then the press went and screwed with our heads saying that the Wii is the best. Wait what did they say? Exactly. Its ok to try to attract casual gamers and non-gamers but probably 90% of the gaming market is HARDCORE GAMERS. Thats where your money is. You made a sweet console, now make some sweet hardcore games cause I dont want to spend 250$ just so my party can be a little bit cooler. Then the console that has the most to offer was lost in the lies. LOST I TELL YOU! The Xbox 360 has the biggest fan base, the most games, and probably the biggest online gaming community rivaled only by World of Warcraft and Counter Strike:Source. Everyone of the games debuted in E3 with one exception, is coming out this holiday season! Thats a lot of games. And a lot of quality, chunky games at that. Games like Mass Effect which will 'massively effect' you social life if you actually get it because it supposed to have well over 100 levels in the campaign. Halo 3 will undoubtedly be one of the most popular games this holiday with a fan base bad ass enough to buy replica armor models for about 3-4 g's a pop. Project Gotham Racing 4 one of the biggest names in racing sims since Gran Turismo. BioShock, a game so beautiful and fully of creativity you may think that real life looks pale in comparison. And of course it has an amazing line up of Xbox Live Marketplace and Xbox Live Arcade titles ready to download at the click of your controller. If had to choose one console to satisfy my E3 favorite pick and my only console to last through the winter, it is the Xbox 360.

Procrastination : The Art of Mastering Boredom

Being bored. We all hit that point almost daily. (Unless you are like a freak who can go bungie jumping everyday then simultaneously go and like attack some terrorist who just happened to be floating in your path as you jump off that bridge/cliff.) But even better is intentional boredom. Thats right folks, if you are reading this you are probably putting of something else much more important. The fine art of procrastination has been taught from generation to generation and is a necessary skill tree for the average human character to survive. Lets examine to Power Level this skill.

Stage 1 : Childhood.

The public school system is one of the fastest ways to level up your procrastination abilities. Some mobs to grind on this skill are, Not Doing Homework (Level3), Talk To Friends In Class (Level 7), Play Games In Class On An Electronic Device (Level 10), Sleep In Class (Level 13), Skip Class (Level 20 BOSS). After school the home and neighborhood is an excellent means of gaining new means to procrastinate. EG- Watching TV for extended periods of time (20 SP), Staring at the wall (35 SP), and wandering around cause various chaos (50 SP).

Of course there are other stages in life such as Teenage Years (Expansion Pack for Childhood), Adult Life, and Retirement. But the fact is the system has put us down by stamping away at our creativity. Fight back my people, fight back.

Transformers : More Than Meets the Eye

If you have not seen Transformers yet, you have missed out on the single greatest experience of the summer. It was funny, it was intense, it was effing Transformers. I cannot describe how amazing that movie was. Forget what you have ever thought a movie based off of a Japanese cartoon show started in the 80's could be, this is amazing. My unofficial motto for the movie is- "Its fast cars, huge explosions, and giant robots. Oh yeah and there is a hot girl here and there." I will not even spoiler your movie experience if you haven't seen it yet... ROBOTS DIE!!! (sry rele i had 2 but i mean come on. its transformers!!!11oneelevenone11!!!) So go see this movie now! I will have a full review soon but this should be enough convincing.

Rings of Fire : 360 Woes Are Actually Sony's Fault!

As many good 360 owners know, there is a plague amongst them and their trusty consoles. (Well semi-trusty.) The infamous ring of fire has attacked nearly 33 % of all Xbox 360's at one point or another according to a Canadian survey. (But really, why not American? I am sure that if they interviewed American consumers they would get a lower percentage. Simply because the fanboys aren't too easy to give up their hardware.) In a recent diagnosis, it turns out the parts that cause the ring of fire to occur are produced by a sub-owned Sony company. Fanboys, grab your torches and prepare to flame, I will even dip myself in oil to add to the damage you deal out whilest you flame. But this is what it looks like : Sony is a big company that owns a littler company called TeikaData Inc. that produces key components for the Xbox 360 consoles that are supposed to have a life time of 10 years or more. But some only live to around 12 months or so before massive  brand-killing failures. And guess what? The PS3 came out nearly 12 months after the 360 was introduced. What brilliant timing on behalf of Sony and what idiocy on behalf of M'Soft. Gates, you got owned, hard.

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MMO's : Building Better People?

Study Finds MMO Players Make Great Leaders - Shacknews

So this random study found that people who play massively mutliplayer online games, are better leaders. It really does make sense though and I can testify to it. When you serve on a CAL Team for two seasons and accept orders and give orders you almost learn to do what is needed without questioning. It truly is a beautiful thing because you learn to depend on your creativity as well as the virtually rendered man next to you within the heat of battle. Check it out. Its worth a few minutes of your time to educate yourself.

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Chumby : Widget Wake Up

So your "continently" destroyed your alarm clock is in the bin and you need a new one (Believe me you will break yours too after you hear about this thing.), where do you start? Well the stereo/alarm clock is always a good choice. Then there is always the iPod built in alarm you could use with your dock. (I had to use my iPod as an alarm clock for months, and since I modded it with RockBox, it was a pain to remember to turn the volume back up after a full night of iDoom or GBC emulator games.) This is where Chumby, a gadget guru's dream, comes in. This Wi-Fi enabled device, streams widgets from your PC and the Web to your Chumby. You can have blog feeds, music, videos, and pictures on your Chumby constantly updated through its Wi-Fi connectivity. So your hooked right? Not yet? Well what if we told you that it doesn't run on batteries, grabs the exact time from the web, is completely touchable, and is also open source to hardware and software mods. This is your dream programmers. Finally you can get all your internet addictions without having to touch your computer. The final Chumby's will be available for 200 $ sometime this summer and will include: a 3.5" LCD color touchscreen, two external USB 2.0 full-speed ports, a 350 MHz ARM controller, 64 MB SDRAM 64 MB NAND flash ROM, stereo 2W speakers, a headphone output, a squeeze sensor, an accelerometer (motion sensor), wi-fi connectivity, and an integrated microphone. Heck if I made enough money this summer I was going to get a PS3 or Wii in addition to my extensive wish list, but this is definitely pushing those out of it.

Juice Bags : Energizing Your Gadets on the Go

Heck with all the scientologists running around Manhattan and Vegas crying Armageddon onto humanity for a lack of respect for the environment, don't you just want to rub it in their faces? Its a fact thought, we are attacking our fragile world with our industrious wastes and few of us care. Hey I am not here to preach, I want to be as green friendly as possibly but its hard when I see that 360 Elite screaming buy me and play me none stop on that 32" LCD HDTV with that shiny screen that you can see your darling like figure of a face in. But this is where Juice Bag's comes in to save the day just as Captain Planet would if he weren't blue, had green hair, and got a decent set of clothes. Juice Bag's are regular backpacks or messenger bags with a solar panel on the flap of the bag to give you 6.3 watts of power to charge anything using a CLA power adapter (You know the thing that used to be used to heat up car lighters but now is used to charge cell phones, iPods, heck can even be converted into a typical electrical outlet to do God knows what). Do yourself a favor and save about 8 plastic bottles from the landfill. Saving those poor rejected liquid containment modulators and charging up your mobile devices will set you back at most $225.00 for the new Environmental series backpacks or $175.00 for the original-not-as-completely-amazing-or-as-pro-earth-as-the-other-model Juice Bag 1.0. This is one backpack I will be sure to sport to school and camping for the next few years to come.

Escape

So the pain ebs and flows.
Never can you guess which way it goes.

The pain is like a terrifying tide.
Always watching your back and each side.

Maybe a bandaid, maybe a chemical.
Nothing can heal this wound of that dark hell.

Society scars and blames the rest.
We can't going living as men without a test.

Never a challange in sight to show.
Never being able to display true strength for mates and bros.

Its a curse, its a trap.
And the only to escape is inside the dreams of your naps.

Battle for Heaven's Right (First Draft)

Here I am, or rather there I lie.

Down on my back in a coffin.

Yet instead of being surrounded by mourners,

I am surrounded by the purest white.

No sun, no ground, no space to be seen.

Just me, my suit, and my coffin.

I see myself lying there as though in third person.

I command myslef to get up, screaming, begging, helpless.

Finally i hear a booming voice call my name and my body wakes,

Yet still I don't see though my own eyes.

For they are clouded over by white as pure as my surroundings.

Suddenly a firey creature appears from the white.

He smells of smoke and his name is evil.

He calls my name and horrified I stumble foward.

I shot to tell my body to stop.

Then I realize, evil is trying to steal my soul.

I tell my body to run but the beast strikes with a sword of smoke.

The pain is nearly unbearable but my body my body shows no wounds.

The counfused beast strikes again and again, but my pain numbs with each blow.

In the blink of an eye I see myself go from helpless, to warrior.

My sheild bears a cross and my sword says "TRUTH".

It is time to defend myself at the oppressor of my soul.

With each successful blow I land, I hear scripture quoted in a foreign voice.

Then I see my mouth moving with the scripture and and light pours forth.

When it is time to finish the beast, my sword drops on the weakened best,

And even as the creature is slayed I shot, "I AM HEAVEN'S CHILD!"

As the creature's body fades out of the white abyss,

The white dissolves to reveal a word that must be Heaven.

I have crossed the barrier between heaven and hell and made it to my eternal home.

My eyes change to their normal blue,

And as they blink I return to a view that is familiar.

But at the same time, what I see has never been seen by them.

Before me stands God, with him Jesus, and all around is the Holy Ghost.

In unison, all three speak the words I have lived to hear,
"Well done though good and faithful servant.
Thou stood up for me what no one else could.
Thou served me when no one else would.
And thou lived for me as all others should.
The battle you just fought was your life.
Even as the demon struck you with temptations,
You still resisted and fought knowing I would never fail you.
Well done Paul, well done my servant of the cross."

Through the tears of joy I see streets paved with gold.
A sea, clear as crystal shimmers in the distance.
The gates of heaven, made of pearls unbelievably large.
Walls, made of of diamonds and the purest stones.
But the greatest thing it that the light,
Comes not from stars, but always radiates from the Holy Trinity.
I have found my peace. Not the calm before the storm, but the silence after.